Omaha seems to be having a break in the weather, and, unlike me, Jamie didn’t want this awesome opportunity for me to do manual labor to just slip away. So, despite my attempt to ignore her and play Left 4 Dead with the kids in the basement, she managed to push me up the stairs and into the harsh light of Omaha in October.

I tend to be a man of shifting philosophical stances, and this morning my philosophy on mowing lawns was that if the job was not worth doing, it was worth doing poorly.

Even so Jamie would have to admit that I mowed the front yard well. I even made her mom move her car off the 4 inches of grass that her right tires were sitting on. I was that dedicated.

The backyard, well…I lost my way. I was not so dedicated to the backyard. Basically I mowed about three quarters of my backyard, got really tired of mowing and called it good.

And come on now. Let’s be honest.

The front yard is the really important part of any yard. That’s the part that people actually see. I don’t think that the backyard isn’t all that important, especially in October. There’s going to be snow out there, and snow covers all the grass and you can’t even tell how thick the grass is at that point.

And anyways, aren’t you supposed to let your lawn grow longer in the fall so it’s healthier in the spring or something?

I mowed the middle, and part of the sides. I mowed around the patio, and under the windows. I did not mow around the trees, which is kind of a hard place to mow because it’s all twisty and you have to turn the mower all the time.

Once I was done, I took a good long look at my work and thought it looked pretty good. It was different, and different is good.

My wife, of course, didn’t like it. She announced this on Facebook, in her usual distainful way.

And I responded in my usual way.

My Lawn Is A Masterpiece

I’m sure I’ll be mowing tomorrow, but I won’t be happy about it.

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